Insane Facebook Status

  1. I just got a new jacket. It’s so lovely! It’s white and it lets me hug myself as much as I want! Hooray for me!
  2. After years of observation,multiple hypothesis,well-structured analysis and deeply reviewed interpretations.I finally came to ONE CONCLUSION: I’M NOT NORMAL
  3. Your lips look so lonely. Would they like to meet mine?
  4. I am so excited i only have to ride the short bus for 2 more weeks,then i get to ride in the van.
  5. hears “POP..POP..POP..” then giggles because they likes bubble wrap
  6. Don’t ever, ever EVER!!! Touch a crazy woman’s pudding!!! I will STAB YOU WITH A SPOON!
  7. is not insane. and SO not easily distracted- HEY! My Pet Banana RAN INTO THE MONKEY EXHIBIT AT THE ZOO! Yellows! RUN! NO! they dead. the funerals tomorrow.
  8. I am not insane, the word you’re searching for is crazy. The difference is that I know exactly what I am doing.
  9. Chased a parked car,tripped over a cordless phones cord,went to the mall and played hide’n’seek with staff,corrupted some minds,hiding fromcops!I REGRET NOTHING
  10. “Taste the rain-” “BITCH PUT MY SKITTLES DOWN!” the fuck wrong with you?
  11. People who don’t know me think that I’m crazy. People who know me already know that I’m crazy. After today, I’m starting to believe all of them.
  12. Some days we’re just one clown short of a circus around here!
  13. People say that you have to be insane to understand some of the things in life… well, I’m all set!
  14. is busy zoning out as my brain has left the building. Please try me again in a month maybe then I’ll be sane. If not check areas with white padded walls…
  15. it’s okay to dance to your own tune, even if it’s being hummed by the voices in your head.XD
  16. Today my inner child threw a tantrum because the voices in my head refused to share the sandbox of my mental playground. It was weird.
  17. I’m a little tea pot short & stout, here is my handle, here is my handle-DAMN I’m a sugar bowl!
  18. It took me all this time to lose my mind, what on earth made you think I would want a piece of yours?
  19. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room with no windows.It drove me monkeys!MONKEYS! Monkeys are Ninjas.Isn’t that crazy? Crazy? I was crazy once…
  20. wonders if ZEBRAS r black with white stripes or white with black stripes??? The voices in my head were just arguing bout it…I need to shut them up!!
  21. it’s okay to dance to your own tune, even if it’s being hummed by the voices in your head.XD
  22. people think I’m crazy,there just jealous because gummy bears talk to me not them.
  23. Is playing hide n seek with the voices in my head, I’m under the stairs they will never find me ha. WAIT! I DON’T HAVE STAIRS, CRAP! WHERE AM I?!?
  24. <-some people call it crazy..I prefer “HAPPILY INSANE”!!
  25. come to the dark side, we have cookies,and bring a light-bulb its dark over here
  26. A random dwarf just ran into my bedroom and kicked me in the shin!
  27. I need music, because when it gets to quiet the voices in my head get really loud.
  28. today I’m going to find the evil fairy that lives in the dryer that keeps stealing my socks!! If you don’t see me tomorrow call the cops.Wish me luck!!
  29. I’m not crazy nor do I have anger issues,it’s just that this rock told me it really wanted to hit you in the head!
  30. That squirrel just took my Twinkies! Somebody stop them! So what if they’s in a ninja outfit? Get them!
  31. thinks that thinking about the thoughts of thinking are too thinkable for thoughts to be thought about thinking, i think
  32. I’m NOT crazy ! crazy is dialing 911 on the microwave and looking around where’s the big red truck?? i only did that twice…
  33. some days,the little angel on my left shoulder is out somewhere, and I’m alone with the little red guy on my right.Those days I suggest all u ppl watch out. 😀
  34. all i can say is a bra is like a good friend. they hold up, don’t let you hang,keep you balanced, an dare always there to support you.
  35. People say I’m crazy…I hate those people…I am not crazy, I am insane!There’s a difference!HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL THEM!?
  36. Last night I fell asleep to the ninja monkeys chanting my name, a rainbow pig flying over my head and a dancing yellow hippo in a orange tutu,, 😀
  37. This is MY corner of the institution! Do you hear me? MINE. MINE. MIIIINE! Back away real slowlike! NOW!!
  38. Someone once told me that I was the most well adjusted person they knew. I told their that they most know some pretty screwed up people.
  39. The Flying Purple Wombats of Doom are attacking the Rainbow Squirrels of Retribution in my backyard! Where are the Jolly Chipmunks of Justice when you need them
  40. The cookie monster smelled crumbs on my laptop and has chased me into my closet..Please somebody help me! My laptop is going dead and it’s getting dark!
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